Music

It came delivered to me outside CJ Koh Library where i was studying



My life would never be the same :]

Finally

Blooies' Post Negotiations celebration @ 1918hrs

Congratulations to a job well done!!

Celebrated the end of Negotiations with inch-thick meat patty burgers (mine was 2 inches, cos it was a double cheeseburger), lots of drinks, and pool at BLOOIE's Bar and Grill, at Science Park behind PGP.



::Requiem of Today 30/03/05::

I realised so much how I hate power struggles and the people behind them, and how much I detest nepotism and the people who insist they are right all the time while ignoring the fact that they are only furthering their own interest. Equally disgusting are those who continually shoot their mouth off insensitively while making fun of everyone (even friends) around them, not knowing that perhaps, they themselves, are too equally flawed. And being totally beliggerent and bigoted about how right they are and how stupid/dumb/wrong i am about it. Balls to you. Fish off! I don't have to be nice to you if your attitude stinks. (Forgive me if I had held anger in my heart)

"Laugh it off
Let it go and
when you wake up
this will be...
just yesterday"

If its all been done what's there left to do. Koon la!!

Easter

This weekend, birthday aside, was a learning experience.


First time MC(emcee?) on Stage

I think there is a huge difference between "i think you can do it" and "i can do it", because the latter requires experience, and the former is just someone's opinion/expectations of you. However, unable to squirm my way out of the arrow to do MC for Easter Celebrations, i roped in Trish in the last minute to help me "ra-ra" the crowd. I think i made a wise choice. Chemistry between the hosts should be the utmost consideration when choosing a partner, because little things like saying "hi, I'm James, (her) and hi i'm trish, (together) and we are your emcees for tonight" could prove to be impossible if coordination was lacking. But that aside, i think the fact that we both have chemistry offstage made it a lot easier on stage. I surprised even myself. Me, a person who has always shunned the spotlight like the plague, found it surprisingly non-painful to do what i did (Although i could have spoken a little bit louder says reliable feedback), I am pretty much proud of myself, for i guess I have conquered a little everest of my own, and I'm glad the audience responded so heartily to the games we were playing and the shout-outs (luckily) did not fall flat on my face.

End of an experience

Last Saturday was the last day of work for me as the Pilot-Run for the "Employability Skills System" trial run has ended. I thank William for getting me this lobang, because through this job, helping retrenched/not as educated persons find a suitable IT/Office Skills course for them is both fulfilling and insightful. Fulfilling cos I know it would be beneficial for them, Insightful because it revealed another facet of myself that I didn't know existed. Apparantly I have an EXTREMELY HIGH tolerance for difficult people. I guess thats the whole nature of customer service. Sometimes I wonder why these people are so difficult when we are helping them select time slots for (100% Sponsored, mind you) courses for their own benefit. Its not as if I'm getting any commission, but back to the main point, I have a high threshold, I don't seem to mind if i have to reassure a person ad nauseum, but it gets to me when I deal with long-winded people (they tell you grandmother stories of how happening their lives are and make it so difficult for you to choose course schedule for them, so why signup in the first place?) As devious/not-nice as it seems, I have learnt to "control" them (and move them along) or else I don't need to go home liao. Hmmm, negotiations skills? Haha. Anyway, I'm glad I had this opportunity. Boss said she'll hire me for other assignments next time, so I'm waiting. KILL! haha.

Takeover issues

I am going to ORD liao! Finally get to vacate this Vice-Prez post and start studying! Anyway Mike and me were like pants on fire when no one replied to the yahoogroups email to run for comm, and he made me write another, with the specific instruction "not to sound too desperate". Haha, I did, and guess what. We now can have democratic elections due to the overwhelming number of signups. Haha! (Well, I had to call some to ask, but thats fine yea) Can't wait to grill them in the interviews. Muhahaha


Footnotes

I need to finish the negotiations nonsense. Its tomorrow!


Signing off,
Agent Jared
Situational Extrovert Extrodinarre

Break!

--Birthday Countdown@ Zouk Winebar 24th March 00:15hrs--





(Looks like some JUICE Magazine backpage)

:::Post Zouk Chillout @ 0300hrs:::


Bak kut teh!

:::Jap food Buffet @ Suki Sushi, 13:00 hrs:::




Actually, I had to work that day (from 5-9), but after work, some of my Church friends came over to surprise me with (Instant Milo, Kimchi Ramen Instant Noodles, and Gummies, my fave junk food heh). I think the words "feeling loved" is quite an understatement, be it all the SMS-es, the time spent, the surprises... Ahh, every dog has his day :]

(Most interesting SMS)
From Mabelle
"Happy Bithday! Hope you live to a ripe old age, earn oodles of money, have scores of offsprings so they can all celebrate your 100th birthday with a mountain of shou taos!"

Erm. PS: Mabs, I don't wish to live so old and walk around like a prune all day. Nonetheless, its sweet! haha

Earthquake

Earthquake richter 7 hits Kyushu. Huihua smsed me after i finished church at about 12, but i dismissed it cos Kyushu was so big, maybe it hit Kagoshima in the south or something, but NO, the epicentre had to be Fukuoka, the city i would be leaving for in September. I was quite stunned by the magnitude, and the first thought was:

"is God trying to say something?"
(I am still in the midst of handling my Kyushu app form, a month overdue)

In addition, Mom and Dad had hit funding probs


Cel over MSN said "given tt earthquakes dont happen v.frequently at the same place. maybe God is trying to 'clear things' for u so there will not be another earthquake while ure there", not exactly biblical, but yea, kinda makes sense. I should stop looking at everything in the negative.



On a lighter notes,
Carol treated me to Billy Bombers today (for Thursday heh), and I am now officially hooked on "The Apprentice" --> Considering advertising if Law doesn't work out....

Wantings

I think the thing about me when people ask me what i want for a special day, I say nothing because either it is too expensive to receive as a present, or I would prefer to buy them myself. I usually don't do this, its quite secondary school but since Cheryl asked, here goes:

Wish List 2005

1) iPod Shuffle 512MB (I'll pamper myself and get the iPod Photo)
2) A swatch chrono w/ light metallic strap (Thank you Qiang!)
3) Sony Cybershot W Series DSC-W5 (Silver) + tripod (Thanks Tricia!)
4) Green Day "American Idiot", Moby "Hotel" and Eminem "Encore" albums (Thank you TK, weiwen!)
5) DVD titles: Independence Day, Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind, the Terminal, Kill Bill v.2, A Very Long Engagement, Mean Girls (claimed)
6) Inuyasha Episodes 40-106 (Thank You Huihua, Cheryl, Mabelle!!)
5) Haruki Murakami's "Norwegian Wood" or "Dance Dance Dance" (Thanks Ade & Beng!)
6) Adidas Soccer Jerseys (claimed)
7) A new pair of Doc Martins, mine's wearing out
8) iSight with LED Lights (so i can webcam while in Japan) (Thank You Jason, Meihui, Joan!! :D)
9) A bottle of Chivas Regal, aged 40 years + cool shot glasses


Hahaha, and i thought i did not WANT ANYTHING, i was wrong, I just did not put my mind to it, not that i expect ANYONE to buy any of the above for me, madness, how ex can?


Perhaps it should go something like this:

1) Fulfillment in whatever I am doing
2) Better Grades in Law School (that will be nice, for a change)
3) Knowing how to play the piano (WELL)
4) My parents actually getting me a birthday present for once

Reflective

A reflection of life, and although I am not the maestro, i do channel my feelings into music. (either that or i run). These chords for the acoustic guitar are surprisingly easy, check them out. Its uncanny how this song has the same beat and rhthym of "Wonderwall" by Oasis. Finally, a theme song for myself after i got sick of Nickelback's "Someday" and The New Radical's "Someday We'll Know".

GREEN DAY - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
(American Idiot, 2004)

(rhythm guitar capo on 1st fret)
(electric lead guitar NO CAPO)

Em G
I walk a lonely road
D A Em
The only one I that have ever known
G
Don't know where it goes
D A Em G D A
But its home to me and I walk alone

Em G
I walk this empty street
D A Em
On the boulevard of broken dreams
G
Where the city sleeps
D A Em G D
And I'm the only one and I walk alone
A Em G D
I walk alone I walk alone
A
I walk alone I walk a...

CHORUS:
C G D E5
My shadows the only one that walks beside me
C G D E5
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
C G D E5
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
C G B
Till then I'll walk alone

Em G D A Em
Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh
G D A Em
Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh

VERSE 2:
I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line of the edge
And where I walk alone

Read between the lines
what's fucked up and every thing's all right
Check my vital signs
to know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone I walk alone
I walk alone I walk a...


Author's note:
Apologies folks, try as i might, I cant get blogger to put the space in between the chords. Ah well.

Choices

慢慢离去

Spending Fri, Sat, Sun at Aaron's dad's wake, I wasn't even sure what i could do, pour peanuts for the relatives or..? So i just sat there quietly with min, and seeing Ah lee so busy taking care of all the visitors it dawned on me that it would be my turn soon, and memories of the past just kept flooding back

I don't know what I'm doing

Birthdays I forgot: Suresh's, Joseph's, Weiming's, Mingzhou's: all great friends that have pulled me up when i was adrift as I often am, and i was not there, and I did not remember, I just didn't. I don't know what is happening, disjointment. I have not seen Weiming and Mingzhou this sem, Joe told me that he was expecting at least an SMS from me, and Weiming just called me "mei liang xin" on his blog. I think things came to a head when Marc over MSN said in his usual sarcarstic tone that it would be great if i could come down and join them more often.

Friends are paramount to an only child

Tiring. To be a good son (and getting non stop flak for not being good enough, nort freaking good enough compared to whoever.. why am i even TRYING?), to be financially independent (have to work so that I would not suffer when they decide as and when to cut my allowance, have to work so i can get basic stuff for self), to deny myself daily and to take up this cross (church commitments can engulf your whole life, and and yet, a worship leader is needed, i am working, i can't do it, am i not committed enough? I do not have peers, i did not grow up there, I don't believe in TRYING to make friends, it should come naturally, but even if i wanted to... do i even have the time to invest in discipling?), to be a good student (am not studying, should be studying, i can't go on like this, i wont be qualified to practice), to be a good friend ( Good Friend: where were you when I needed you? Me: ..... ) To be a good bf (huh?!)


Yea, why can't some people realise that I'm not less of a friend even though I CANNOT join movies or other stuff, maybe they don't see out of their pretty kaleidoscope that others have to work to feed themselves, and that doesnt mean I would turn you away if you wanna pour out your troubles to me, and that classifying people as "peripheral friends" that don't water the plant of friendship.... you want your water? You don't realise there is a drought, do you EVEN CARE that there is a drought.


I can't keep this up, I can't. Yet, I can't leave this behind.

有如牧师所说：“人生是个考验，你做的每个选择会让你一步一步迈向目标。”
是吗？　现在有如　自我毁灭　的感觉。

ぜんぜん疲れた

Awakening

Ohaiyo Gozaimasu!

SOunding chirpy today, you ask?

Yea, for the first time this term, I am not crawling into lecture half an hour late.

Why the sudden change, you ask?

Well, because my friend Michael (Tang, not the other one) has just moved into the same level (in PGP) as me! I awoke to him knocking on my door at 8:50am, asking to borrow cleaning equipment to clean his room. I was shocked, because as far as i know, there was no empty room in my level. So i asked to see his room, and discovered that it belonged to the vietnamese guy, but, he has all but moved out. Weird. Its the middle of the sem. So i talked to Ivan (the guy living next to the viet guy) and he told me that sometime last week, the PGP authorities came in and talked to him, regarding the matter of his friend staying with him, and i think he was forced to move out, because of the squatter issue.

Hmmm.

Whats the moral of the story? I don't know. Its pretty tough (economically) for an international student to live in non-student housing. But then again, I'm missing the point, Mike's like next next door!! :]

Inconveniences

This blog is suffering from an identity crisis. It meanders between useless banter and pseudo intellectual insights. Perhaps stemming from the author's range (or lack thereof).

What could probably be bothering so much to cause me to blog at 2am?
Ants.
Freaking, hidden colony of ants.

They are in my teacup, in my fishbowl (and my guppies refuse to eat them), and I just found them eating my toothpaste (colgate Total, time to change, anything that attract ants couldn't possibly be good for your tooth and gums). I am squishing every single one of those buggers that crosses my path, and they still keep coming. After that massacre at 6pm (when i stupidly left a used spoon on my table), the smell of dead ants permeated the air (im sure everyone would know what I am talking about), they just come, and come, and its irritating trying to brush those solitary scouts off your keyboard, better not fucking-BREED inside my laptop, and they just keep coming! Like the communist chinese reds that flooded Korea and vietnam, this is my own cold war, and I seem to be losing to the sheer numbers.

How long would they stay here before they realise that there is nothing to eat (except toothpaste?!)

Attachment!

What is the world coming to. I put my baileys in the sink so that the ants wont find it, and they do. Shit. I missed last sem before the colony moved into my hall room, where i can leave anything on my desk without worrying, and now, even my cough mixture is not safe! Argh!

Viruses are spreading through MSN. Shit, its worse when someone u absolutely trust is infected cos u just click on the link and see garbage. Fuck. Then again, mac is supposed to be immune, i think.


And good news!! I got accepted for an attachment at KhattarWong!
Should i say yes or should I hold out for a reply from Allen & Gledhill? Hmmmmmm